Mind your own business.

20 May 2020

This week has been crazy. 

Is it a full moon?

Or are people just tired of being nice and releasing any and all anger upon whomever is in the way??

Sheesh. 

As if life is not difficult enough. 

Me = Working from home, Two year old Tasmanian devil, packing, beagle, attempting to fix minor issues to sell house, son graduating in June (fingers crossed it isn’t cancelled), husband still deployed, bamboo invasion, beagle escape, 48 loads of laundry, trying to improve credit, no family support, lack of sleep, self-care declining. = I am ok though. I got this. Everything will be fine. 

Then— This morning happened....

A loud banging on my front door. 

I rushed to the door ...

Two officers with the initials M.A.C. Embossed across  their chests. 

Fanfuckingtabulous. 

M.A.C. = McKamey Animal Center— basically the pound for people not ‘round these parts. 

I answer the door. 

Apparently— Mr. Officer (have not idea what his name was) was informed about my big fierce and ferocious beagle is sporadically “at large”. (Yes, I am aware. She’s a damn beagle. She’s the smartest dumbass I know. 

If I put her in the back yard which is very large— she climbs the fence and escapes. 

If I attach her to the runner in the front yard she finagles her collar and escapes. She has eaten 2 harnesses. The bark collar makes her bark more. ) 

He proceeded to advise me that my animal must be contained at ALL times — no exceptions. 

Ok, dude. Gotcha. 

He issued me a FORMAL Warning. 

Fair enough. — I get it, he’s doing his job.  No worries. 

What pisses me off is the fact that ONE of my neighbors decided to call M.A.C. 

Instead of letting me know, sending me a message, coming over to talk to me about it ..... or whatnot. 

What a bunch of asshats. 

I took it upon myself to post a message on my neighborhood next-door page— To relieve. A tad bit of frustration. 

(What I posted is below) 

Hello- 

I hope everyone is well, free from the coronavirus and enjoying this beautiful weather.

 I am always friendly, I help my fellow neighbors, I stay positive and I enjoy the majority of our neighborhood and the atmosphere encompassed within. Though, there are a few neighbors that apparently do not not agree with me. 

*This is the only time I will post something negative to you all ( you know who you are)*

Generating nonsense and drama is uncalled for, Unwarranted and frankly— extremely rude. 

I am working from home, I have a 2 year old, a beagle, a senior in high school, a husband deployed and everything else in between. 

Just a quick note to the neighbors that have issues with my home, my dog and /or my yard— 

If you have a negative perception, a foul thing to say or a complaint keep it to yourself or address me personally otherwise keep your opinions to yourself.

1. Sophie:  I received a home visit by McKameys today due to my dog that keeps escaping and complaints they have received.I apologize Sophie ( my dog )She is not a violent dog, nor is she unfriendly. It  may be a nuisance to you all when she escapes the fence, the lead or barks at you when you stroll the neighborhood. She is a beagle. That’s what she does.  If you are willing to install a fence for free to help contain my dog that would be fantastic. Otherwise, I am doing the best that I can under the current circumstances in which all of us are enduring. Whoever called McKameys- As a common courtesy it would have been nice if you addressed it with me directly.  

2. Bamboo: I understand that some of my neighbors have complaints regarding the bamboo growing erratically in my yard. I am diligently cutting it, attempting to kill it and dig it up. I did not plant it. I cannot prevent it from growing. Feel free to assist me if you would like, instead of calling the city and posting complaints. 

During times like this — in the world we live — One would think — Kindness would spread like wildfire not negativity, hatred, gossip and ill-spirited folks. 

We are all human — In case you may have forgotten. 

How about spreading positivity, helping your fellow neighbor or being friendly instead.

What are your thoughts? Am I overreacting?

Im not black nor white — I am me

30 June 2015

I'm not black, I'm not white. I am human.

Written January 19, 2015

I am not black. I am not white. 

I am me. 

In lieu of Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, I have been pondering his infamous speech. 

How would this world be different is he would have survived?

Would we as a nation be friends?

Would we as a nation enjoy helping others?

Would we as a nation live in perfect harmony without racism, discrimination, bullying and hatred?

My simple answer is, No. 

I am not an African American not am I a Mexican American or even an Indian American. 

My ethnicity is considered Caucasian. 

I am considered Caucasian because my skin is lighter than others. 

I have been told being Caucasian reaps many rewards. 

I must have missed that memo. 

I am a "white" middle-aged female. I have been bullied, discriminated against, spat on, turned away and called a plethora of slanderous names such as "trailer trash", "slut", "dumbass", "loser" and "gold digger". 

Were these statements true?

Of course not. 

But the mind is a powerful thing, when a person is repeatedly called such obscene things, they will believe it. 

I was once told, "you hang with dogs, you will get fleas". This statement was a metaphor spoken to me by my mother about childhood friends. 

As I have grown older, I have realized, that not only do we, as citizens of the great United States of America thrive on negativity, hatred and chaos we surround ourselves with it on a daily basis by choice. 

Not one person was born with a hateful persona, not one person was born racist, not one person was born being judgmental. 

All of these behaviors are learned by our surroundings. 

"Can't we all just get along", is a famous quote spoken by Rodney King after a severe beating he received by police officers that are supposed to serve and protect our great nation. 

Can we all just get along? 

The simple answer yet again is, No. 

We, as citizens legal or not of the United States of America cannot get along. 

This has been beaten (so to speak) into our heads from the dawning of our forefathers. 

We have been taught to judge, speak negatively, discriminate and slander those that anger us. 

Why?

Without chaos, there would be euphoria. With euphoria, people would be serene. Serenity would put those that provide protection, freedom and equality out of the job that they currently possess. 

The world thrives on chaos, watch the news for one hour. Then write down all positive things that were observed. 

This great nation of ours saddens me. My children, grandchildren and future generations have hard work ahead of them. 

America is considered "land of the free, home of the brave"

Let's examine this statement. 

Land of the free: 

What in America is free? Education, religious preference, wearing clothing of choice, committing adultery, air, water....

Education is clearly at the top of my list for discussing freedom. 

Yes, we have the right to attend a public school. 

The downside is school uniforms, supplies, lunches, and fees are not free. 

Any child in America can attend a public school as long as the items mentioned above are taken care of. 

 If a child does not have the name brand uniform, school supplies and enough money to eat they will be bullied, called names and frowned upon. God forbid if they have parents that are gay, the child is over weight, under weight, they live in a trailer or buy their clothing from a thrift store. 

Freedom for education is free, but comes with severe consequences to our youth that will be bottled up and released during adulthood or puberty. 

We read and hear of school shootings, suicides of young children due to being bullied and abused children by teachers. 

This amuses our society, we blame the kids, the parents, the school, the administrators ect. This helps us bottle our anger, discrimination and racism until it involves a certain ethnicity, white, black, purple or yellow. It doesn't matter. 

We were taught at a young age to be rebellious, hate those that shun you, defend yourself even if it means punching someone in the face. 

So, no education is not free. 

The choosing of our religion or place of worship should be a place of refuge. But yet again, it is not. 

Yes, we are free to choose a place to worship. As other countries are not as fortunate. 

Yet we are not free to worship aloud or in public places as we may offend others with our beliefs. 

Wasn't this great nation built on God. "In God we trust" is scripted onto what we hold dear to our hearts, our money. 

Imagine entering a church and being looked down upon because you are homeless and the only clothing you have is ratty jeans and a T-shirt smelling of cigarette smoke and day old liquor. 

"Those without sin, cast the first stone". 

Yet, it's a common practice to be judged and looked down upon in church if you look like a bum, say a curse word or refuse to tithe. 

Religion is not free. 

Let's examine the second half of our nations motto: "Home of the brave."

Do I consider us as Americans in the general population to be brave?

My simple answer is, no. 

I'm not speaking of military, police officers or firemen. I am speaking of the general population of America. The "whites", "blacks" "Hispanics" and so on. 

Are we brave?

Think about this statement for a moment. 

Are you being brave by waking up in the morning? Are you brave when you go to work? Are you brave when you go shopping?

No. 

The home of the brave should be categorized to brave individuals such as the white woman teaching English as a second language in "the hood" of A busy metropolis. 

Brave is a person that helps others without any doubt. Paying forward a previous gift given by an unknown person. Braveness is helping a person out of a fire engulfed dwelling or saving a child from drowning by putting yourself in harms way. 

Are we busy Americans as a general population, brave?

No, we are selfish, ego-filled, slanderous, self-righteous hypocrites that want, want, want never taking the time to help others, say thank you or perform any chivalrous action. 

We, as Americans should not be as we have learned to be. 

We do not need to be filled with such anger, greed and selfishness. 

We need to stop stereo-typing what we have been taught as wrong and ask ourselves, why?

I know what it's like to be hungry, broke and helpless. 

I know what it's like to feel as though the end is near. 

I have been stereo-typed, frowned upon and betrayed. 

But, I choose to overcome all stereo types. I will achieve great things without the negativity. I will teach my children to be fishers of men not because I was taught this but because it is right. I will be friends with "the gays", "trailer trash", "whores" and "blacks". 

I will not judge them because I do not know them. I have not walked in their shoes. 

I will help others without expecting something in return. 

I will give to those that need help. 

I will celebrate the life I was given and be proud to be me. 

I am not perfect but it only takes one person to make a difference, it only takes one thought to change the world. 

Blessed be the homeless, blessed be the blacks, blessed be the whites, blessed be the gays, blessed be everyone as we were all someone's baby. 

Those without sin, cast the first stone. 

One day, Martin Luther King, Jr's. Dream will come true and we all shall live in harmony. 

I hope I am alive to see it. 

I will continue to be me. 

What will you do?

The feeling of failing as a Milso

The feeling of failing as a Milso

Day 114

12 February 2020

Today is the second day of missing work to fix me. 

Do I feel guilty about this. No. 

Should I? No. 

I wasn’t aware that being a Milso would be so difficult physically, mentally and spiritually. 

Alas, I am aware of the symptoms and recognize I am depressed. 

This is extremely unlike me. 

I’m a positive, helpful, motivating and uplifting woman— normally. 

During the last couple of weeks, I have not been. 

I recognize this. 

I have reached out to militaryonesource.com for additional resources. (I would highly recommend this) [1. You will need a DOD login 2. It’s easy to set up your account. — This is for another blog.] 

I realize that my husband is an amazing human. I have never given him enough credit for everything he did while he was home. (I am so sorry) I took him for granted. (I am sorry) my husband is my rock. I have also realized that being a milso is HARD. 

I’ve been a single mother before. With two children and an ex that was a total horses behind. Struggling financially, trying to balance work and life and staying positive. Being a milso is not like this. Period. 

(Rant 1)

Being a milso is NOT:  

• being a single mother/father/caregiver/lover/sigot
• You are married/or in a serious relationship/partnership ect. 

• Your sigot is away sometimes for an extended period of time. 

This does not make you a single parent.

I’m tired of wives/husbands referring to their deployed service member as being an “absent parent”. Seriously— Absent? 

Your sigot is serving our country for your protection, our country's protection and helping your family continue to live in the land of the free. Shut-Up!

For those of you that say you are a single parent when your sigot is deployed is wrong, disrespectful and just plain rude

• You are not “single”.
  
• You are being a parent while the other parent is serving his/her country. 
  

Shut-Up!

• Yes, it sucks, being the head of household— paying the bills, taking little Jimmy here and taking little Jane there, Making all of the meals, all the while stressing, being anxious and waiting for a call or skype. 

• Yes, the deployed member is not at home—for due cause.

Being a milso with a deployed service spouse/ sigot does not justify adultery, “single parent” drama and or whining. So, for the last time SHUT-UP, Suck it up and get the hell over yourself. (End of rant)

Back to my original post— Pre- Rant: I have recognized that I am depressed — I did not realize that my spouse was such a tremendous part and help of everyday life. I have gotten to the point in this phase of deployment where I am completely overwhelmed. 1.I feel as though my achievements are more like downfalls. (This is the depression speaking)2. My self-care has dropped to a nil3. I’m tired. All the time. 4. The only joy I find is the phone call from my husband. 5. My daughter (she’s a wee one) is acting out. 6. My dog (beagle) needs to be trained. 7. I, at times want to throw in the towel. 8. I do not cook meals anymore, I have being going to fast food restaurants. (Totally unlike me) 9.My eating habits suck. 10. My house looks like a tornado came through and everything I had previously organized out of existence has reappeared. 

Recognizing the issues:These are all common depression symptoms. These are all common symptoms of the deployment cycle. 

This too shall pass. 

My current self-care plan (in progress)1. Contact a LCSW2. Visit my PCP.  3. Visit a DoP4. Take time to take care of me. 5. Purge unneeded items that are cluttering my home to add stability and organization to my chaos. 6. Take a relaxing bath7. Change my sheets8. Do laundry 9. Look for a dog trainer10. Let others help me. 
All in all — I am not failing. 

I am just a beautiful mess in progress. 

I must be positive, do great things and care for myself first as I have others to care for. 

Tell me your thoughts.

Any suggestions?

Seabee Wife. 

☮️💟☯️

Acronyms:

Milso: Military Spouse

DOD: Department of Defense

Sigot: Significant Other

LCSW: Licensed Clinical Social Worker aka Counselor

PCP: Primary Care Physician

DoP: Doctor of Psychiatry 

Unamerican

As a wife of a deployed service member, when individuals fail to stand for the National Anthem it makes my blood boil. 

The National Anthem of the United States of America has been our anthem since 1931. 

The flag that is spoken of in the anthem is the flag that was flown over Fort McHenry in Baltimore during the war of 1812 between the United States and the United Kingdom. 

On September 14, 1814– The flag was flown over as the battle had ended. 

“Flag was flown over the fort when 5,000 British soldiers and a fleet of 19 ships attacked Baltimore on September 12, 1814. The bombardment turned to Fort McHenry on the evening of September 13, and continuous shelling occurred for 25 hours under heavy rain. When the British ships were unable to pass the fort and penetrate the harbor, the attack was ended, and on the morning of September 14, when the battered flag still flew above the ramparts, it was clear that Fort McHenry remained in American hands.” -Wikipedia

Where in any of this explanation, history or description does this state anything about inequality, police brutality or the like?

This continued protest is 1. An insult to American’s serving in the Armed forces. 2. Disrespectful to every single service member that fights for these protesters VOLUNTARILY. 

3. UnAmerican-  If you have a problem with the National Anthem feel free to leave America. Nobody is making you stay. 

Oh, say can you see by the dawn's early light

What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?

Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight,

O'er the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming?

And the rocket's red glare, the bombs bursting in air,

Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.

Oh, say does that star-spangled banner yet wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

On the shore, dimly seen through the mists of the deep,

Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,

What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,

As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?

Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,

In full glory reflected now shines in the stream:

'Tis the star-spangled banner! Oh long may it wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore

That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion,

A home and a country should leave us no more!

Their blood has washed out their foul footsteps' pollution.

No refuge could save the hireling and slave

From the terror of flight, or the gloom of the grave:

And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

Oh! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand

Between their loved home and the war's desolation!

Blest with victory and peace, may the heav'n rescued land

Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation.

Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,

And this be our motto: "In God is our trust."

And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

Thoughts?

New Perspective

New Blog: New Perspective

In the voice of Matthew McConaughey : Alright, Alright, Alright. 

Welcome to my space. 

Thank you for reading my blog. I will be posting (fingers crossed) at least once a week— about random things some basic topics are listed below.

I will also be transferring old blog information to this blog.

Please like, subscribe, follow and keep your eyes peeled.

• Weather: Mother Nature at her finest.
• Main stream media/ Social Media/ News/ ect.
• Random thoughts/ Sporadic Rants
• People: Red, Yellow, Black, White— just people. All shapes, colors, sizes. Equal opportunity gossip.
• Animals: Pets and Wild... you never know.
• Family: Extended — Grandparents, aunts, uncles, family trees.
• Caregiving : Taking care of someone else.
• Gardening: legal or illegal.
• Mental Health: My family treat has nuts, fruits and bats.
• Homeopathic remedies: DYI
• Buildings/ Construction/ Architecture
• Adventures/ Quests
• Recipes/ Food / Foodies/ Restaurants
• Children, Teenagers and the assholery.
• And so much more….

Nothing is off limits for me.

With the exception of clearly immoral items. (I will specify later)

If you have a question, Ask me.

I will research, dig and find the information.

My former blog page is inaccessible

Danalthemom.blogspot.com due to being hacked and losing all of my information alas you can still read it.

(So go read it)

Once again, thank you for reading.

Enjoy, pull up a chair and stay a while.

-Danalthemom2

Little Bunny- Willow